For Really Reals.....No Really

Ok, I have been absent doing non-bloggy, "real worldy" type things for the past month....I also haven't wanted to blog, to share, to spew forth meaningful sentiments and thoughts because well, because I suddenly became unemployed a couple of weeks ago (Merry Christmas to me!). You have to understand that although I was unhappy at my new-ish (now suddenly gone, poof, dunzo) job I had no idea that A) I was doing a bad job, or even a semi-bad job B) things like being fired happened to me, I mean seriously I am demanding of myself and I just am still somewhat gape mouthed about the whole thing C)searching for a job during the most Holiday of times would be quite the experience that is has become.

In the grand tradition of my WASP-Y forefathers (and mothers) this is not a post to moan, to explain how terribly blue the days seem when all you want to do is something that feels vaguely useful that doesn't involve Monster.com or sitting at a computer revamping a resume that utilizes the terms "Administrative, Implemented process' and bookeeping" way too many times....Oh No this post is about making lemons from lemonade my friends. Below are my top five favorite things about this whole experience:

1.) Temp agencies all have the same automated tests - It's True! I am now registered with three different employment agencies and I have to say the worst part about the two hours it takes to register at these places is the testing. The Microsoft Word test, the data entry test, the Excel test...etc... I usually have The Dread about computer skills test that don't let you use shortcuts which are what everyone uses because, well because they are Awesometown and make things ten thousand million times easier! But after realizing that all temp agencies use the same testing software I had the last laugh! By the time I did the third agencies test I was a MENSA level computer skills genius......hoorah!

2) As an underemployed person - (phew, it still seems weird to type that)- you now have a legitimate excuse for not buying a Streetwise...

3) During the holiday season the last thing that people want to do is interview potential workers, although if you do get an interview be thankful and commiserate with them. I had an interview at a law firm the week before Christmas and we spent more time talking smack about O'Hare then we did about the position itself..I still haven't heard back from that company but, at least I had the pleasant experience of dishing about which terminal in O'Hare has the best Hudsons bookstore.....and let me say it was worth going downtown just for that....

4) When home for the holidays and underemployed realize that folks asking about your job while unaware that you until recently had a job and are still mourning the loss of that job aren't being cruel they are just being people. MAN, when you can't talk about the weather anymore people love to talk abut who works where... In this instance it is ok and not lying to pretend your job still exists because really nothing brings down the holiday spirit more than unemployement talk.....

5) When it seems impossible it really is ok. This is truth people. Bigger things happen in the world everyday then losing jobs or gaining jobs (i.e Pakistan, Iraq, cancer). If you are semi-literate, presentable and have a good phone voice (qualities I thankfully have) then you will get hired. You just have sit around watching Netflix for few days (La Vie En Rose - brilliant a bit long but the actress who played Piaf was stunning, No Reservations - Good, I wish I was Anthony Bourdain, Peep Show - One of the funniest BBC comedies I've seen, The Black Adder - Not one of the funniest BBC comedies I've ever seen, Rowan Atkinson slightly annoys me,yeah I said it!) until the holidays pass and all will right itself.

So, I went home for a week of crazy Connecticut Christmas madness...a post for another day - got a head cold lost entire portions of Christmas Eve and Day because of a deadly mix of cold medicine, slept on an air mattress in the basement of my Mom's condo, saw good friends, had lots of yummy food...yada yada...It was a nice break from all of the stuff I've listed above. During the Holidays it almost seems like everyone is unemployed.....